factoids

1. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom: best and worst movie ever

Is it even a movie?  Does it count?  It's one of the few movies that, if somebody argued passionately for how great it was and somebody else argued passionately for how terrible it was, each would probably have me nodding in total agreement.  Did I hear somewhere (Goonies DVD commentary?) that Ke Huy Quan basically quit Hollywood because he was just being used as a cute little Chinese stereotype?  Or is 13 just the expiration date for cute little Chinese sterotypes?  Doesn't matter: in 1984 [note: this blog will have nothing to do with the '80s] I was six years old, and I thought Ke Huy Quan was fucking cool.  After Temple of Doom I needed a Yankees hat.  [Actually, that reveals less about Ke Huy Quan than it does about me: I care so little about sports that the only reason I ever got a baseball cap was because Short Round wore one.]  He was the 1984 equivalent of, I don't know, Sam Rockwell?  If Sam Rockwell put on a Yankees hat, I'd probably buy another one.  Has Sam Rockwell put on a Yankees hat?  DON'T TELL ME, I DON'T CARE.

2. A couple of things that piss me off.

(a) People who step onto the subway in New York and just stop in the door and stand there like, "OK, I'm on the train now, we can go," as if no one else might want to get on.  You know when you try to get on the train and the door is packed like rush hour in Hell, and you look around and it's fucking empty inside?—like 20 people are crammed into the little space by the door because no one wants to step into the car?  Why don't people want to step into the car?  Are they afraid they won't be able to make it off at their stop?  I doubt it: half the folks who plant themselves in the door are fuckin' tough guys in their 20s and 30s—not that they can't be full of anxiety.  I mean, hold it, of course they're full of anxiety!  That's why they're tough guys!  News flash / insight: tough guys are invariably insecure babies.  So, OK, right, moving on—  People need to get on and off of the subway!  Why do you think that it's OK for you to block the door if there are other places to be?  Is it your special spot?  God, people are stupid.

(b) Relatedly, don't you love it when you're driving and you try to pass somebody, usually someone riding in the passing lane when no one is around for miles, and that person speeds up because he doesn't want you to pass?  I don't even have anything to say about this, it's so stupid.

(c) People are stupid!

(d) But what really fucking pisses me off is when I'm stupid.  And when I catch myself being stupid, I get mean.

(e) Blogs.  I mean, what the fuck?

3. Oh, right, so...

Why was Ke Huy Quan so cool?  Am I the only one who thought he was fucking cool?  I mean, I was six.  One thing is, he loves Indy but eschews the typical little-kid role of son: surely an orphan, Short Round never betrays any particular vulnerability—certainly less than the misogynist cartoon character that is Willy—and he may imitate Indy's actions, but he also talks back to Indy, shouts at him, not like an angry kid but like an equal.  What's cooler to a six-year-old boy than an only slightly older-looking kid who hangs out with Indiana Jones and gets into shouting matches with him?

But now I'm starting to bore even myself.