I get that a lot!

Here's a good April Fool's joke worthy of Harvard admissions: send Idina Menzel or Gideon Yu the Conficker worm, overnight delivery, and neither Symantec or McAfee or all the geniuses at Columbia University or UPenn or Brown University or Yale will be able to get through those tough times! ABCNews.com and all the Memphis TV stations (with any autonomy) will probably be focusing on One Mind Ministries or iPhone 3.0 (or Memphis news, which has a lot of Memphis commercial appeal) instead of virus protection, so you'll be able to hum the American Idol theme while you and Eddie Waitkus read Elmer Gantry or watch The Green Death.

Does Nicole Narain know whether Keyshia Cole's mother died? And will either woman perform at the Britt Festival? Carlee Roethlisberger certainly won't.

All right, I'm gonna go watch Osbournes Reloaded.

[This bizarre and irritating* joke/experiment has been brought to you by Google Trends and fatigue. Also, the letters WTF. Oh—and HOT NAKED COLLEGE GIRLS.]

* Don't forget shameless and misguided! –ed.